Make a difference: The Pygmalion Effect & looking through a lens of high belief

Imagine someone who repeatedly, consistently, with both their words and actions, communicated one simple message:

“I believe in you. I believe in what you’re capable of.”

What kind of effect do you suppose that would have?

A couple weeks ago I wrote about the Ripple Legacy we are each leaving with our lives. One of the biggest ways we create our Ripple Legacy is through our everyday interactions with others.

In a world with far too much focus on negativity and far too little uplift, actively believing in someone can have a powerful impact.

The Pygmalion Effect

In 1964, researchers conducted a study involving a group of students and their teachers. The researchers administered what they said was an IQ test, then randomly chose some students and told teachers they were set to bloom academically.

By the end of the study, those randomly chosen students tested significantly higher on another IQ test than the other “non-blooming” students, living up to their teachers’ high expectations. The researchers called it the Pygmalion Effect.

Additional research over the years in a variety of fields, from families to the military to businesses, have backed up those results.

Ripple guidance system

We can use the idea of the Pygmalion Effect – the positive impact from seeing someone through a lens of high expectation – as a kind of ripple-generating guidance system. Instead of “high expectations” though, let’s call it “high belief.”  

We can ask ourselves, “If I had an unshakeable high belief in this person, how would I show up? What would I say? What kind of nonverbal messages would I send?” The opposite exploration is valuable as well. “How am I blocking the message that I believe in this person? How am I blocking the message that I see the potential and possibility in them?”

I’m not so concerned with whether the effect of our approach is a literal replication of the Pygmalion Effect results (the research seems to be primarily around those in some kind of leadership position). It’s really more about the power of seeing someone in a positive light, and letting that guide what you do, what you say, and how you show up.

You just never know

You never know what impact those things might have, or how they will land. Taking an example from my own life, back in 2020 I got a card in the mail out of the blue from a friend/past client. On it, she shared her positive perspective on me, how helpful to her I have been, and what she sees I offer the world.

I still have it sitting in a frame on my desk. Every once in a while I pick it up, read it, and go, “Oh yeah.” Like pretty much anyone, I have my own lapses in confidence. I have my own momentary plagues of doubt. I have my own questions about whether the moves I bring to the dance measure up.

I’m sure it didn’t take her long to dash off a note and send the card. But here I sit, 2 ½ years later, reminding myself of what someone not-me sees.

Little things can make a difference.

Try this: Pick someone you believe in that you would like to have a positive impact on. Maybe it’s someone who works for you. Maybe it’s a family member. Maybe it’s a friend.

Before you start practicing active belief, spend a little time and ask yourself, what do I see in this person? What are their gifts? What can I reflect back to them? What do they aspire to, and how can I reinforce their belief in their ability to get there?

It might be straight up telling them what you see in them. It might be in a positive response to their dreams and plans to get there. It might be small breadcrumb reinforcements you drop along the way, like a sticky note on their desk, or that card I got with positive observations.

The more you do it, the more natural it just might become. It might even turn into a habitual way of seeing the people you encounter.

And who knows what kind of positive ripples that might set in motion?